Cooking with Chef Gus!
Welcome to the weekly "Cooking with Chef Gus!" I help cats cook up delicious and easy meals!
This week's entree - delicious bowl of random madness.
Ah curiosity haz set in... what iz that you may ask? Well, that's the fun part - nobody knows!
Here's what you'll need:
Human fridge - the big food storage container that the humans jealously guard iz the fridge. It haz so much magical treats and awesomeness in there. It iz nice and cool... and haz shelves for climbing and doing cat stuff.
bowl - find a big giant bowl. This iz important, becuz we'll be smashing a lot of stuff in this.
hammer - this iz always an important tool to haz... perfect for chaos and destruction.
- Big wooden spoon - or any spoon to stir.
So, first things first - we need to get into the fridge. This can be hard and requires human crazy gorilla strength to open. Here iz an idea that haz worked for me. Get some type of string... human dental floss iz always my choice (Super strong and I usually eat it afterwards...) and tie it around the handle. If you haz a dog roommate - this iz perfect. Tie the other end to the dog, and then once secure, swat or threaten the dog into pure terror mode and watch him tremble. He'll take off and voila - door flies open. If no dog roomate... just pull at it with your claws of awesomeness until it opens.... or use the hammer. Just smash it wildly until the fridge iz defeated and surrenders. (plus its fun!)
Now that the fridge iz open, take a second to be amazed. Do some browsing, and lick everything you see. Now go grab everything possible, doesn't matter if you know what it iz or not, just grab everything and clean out the fridge. Smack it off the shelves until everything iz on the kitchen floor. The messier the better.
Grab the giant bowl. Put in az much az you possible can of whatever iz on the floor into the bowl.
Grab the hammer. Smash like the incredible hulk until everything iz a giant gooey murder scene. It helps to scream az loud az you can while you do it... it iz science. Try to smash and destroy az much az possible.
Grab the spoon. Stir the murdered fridge inards within the bowl. It iz probably horrible and insanely disgusting... but that iz not the point. We iz cats... and we enjoy chaos. Wait for the human to come home or notice... and then slowly lick the death bowl until the human either vomits or screams.
The human's reaction iz the best of all.
Until next time, cheers!
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